Sometimes

Sometimes I get confused, frustrated at the way things are or how they turn out. Difficult times in life seem to block and even crush me. I begin to get feelings of doubt of who i am, what might have hapened differantly if I had done something. I ask if what hapend was my fault, did i spurr on the inevitible? It is then I realize that I am wrong. I did nothing wrong. Others make choices, but they do not realized that the aftermath is caused by them and that the consequenses affect everyone in their life and people beyond their understanding. THose affected have to make choices for the best and that cant be changed. Right now those chioces hurt and stab me, making me wonder if i did the right thing. I stop now and shake the doubts from my mind, denying Satan the mike in my mind and heart and fully give it over to Jesus. The next year and longer will be hard but I know i made the right choice, though painful beyond what i can say. He gave and gives me strength to go on and face the new things that lay before me. Changes are unavoidable but i will look for ward to them instead of dreading them, beliving that I have the best guide and comforter at my side. All fear and doubt cast aside and pacing faster around the next corner of life that appears ahead of me.

First day....

So!... that was the longest school day of my life. Literaly! I got out of school at 3:20!
I ride the buss to school. Its ok since the girls on there are really nice. There is this awesome kindergardener too who we call the cool kid. Hes the only little kid allowed to sit in the back of the buss. lol It was Very weird walkin in the front door to a new school and having everyone stare at me when I walk by. Totaly creepy. Im like one of the only new kids there.
1st. period- English: Didnt go. The whole school went to an assembly andthe principle introduced all the teachers.
2nd. period- Study hall: There was only me and two special edd kids who were usin gthe room. I was so lonely for everyone that i almost cried. So i wrote down about 41 of my friends names on my notebook along with AHS in big bold print. I felt so patheticly alone... I even kinda missed Up's.
3rd. period- Spanish one in a Spanish three class: There are only five other girls besides me in there. Since i'm in the class i get to go on the trip to a forign country that speaks spanish. The teacher is cool. No food besides lunch is allowed in the school but she says if we bring it in before school and stash it in her back cubbord its perfectly fine with her.
4th. period- Algebra II: Didnt go. There was another assembly for allthe high schoolers and we just read over the hand book. I kept nodding off and almost tumbled down the bleachers. lol. That would have been a great first impression on the school. Only new kid falls asleep and tumbles down the bleachers onto gyum floor durring the principles speach infront of the whole high school.
5th. period- Art I: I cant wait to get started. The teacher is nice but her hair is thining really bad. I kept nodding off in that class too. Im excited to get started on our projects and portfolios.
6th. period- Chior: All i can say is that i am appaled and disapointed. We sand kindergarden songs to warm up. Almost no one takes the class seriously. It is more like a fun class. It makes me sick. The class could barely sing together and half of them were off key.
7th. period- Journalism: A very serious and studious class. I made a good impression on the teacher i guess since she had me pass out papers and i was the first person to get an assignment. I feel like a teacher pet but dont really like it. I cant wait till we get in to our essays though. The class also dose the newspaper for the school and the yearbook.
All i can say is this will be an interesting year and i reall miss AHS!

Tomorow!

Aug! I cant belive that I start school tomorow! Well I can belive it but its come so fast! I am at a brand new school with like 1/10 the kids at my old school, and I have to ride the buss to school and I dont know any one and ... Im really nervous! Alot of people have told me ill fit right in and make friends fast (course! there are like only 130 kids in the high school!) I dont know what to expect. Im kinda excited for this new adventure, but im really nervous too. What can tomorow bring me? We will see wont we?;-)

The best day of my summer

I went to Helena yesterday to visit a friend an it was such a AWESOME day!
I had such a blast and it really was a great time. It is the highlight of my summer and I cant wait to go visit again. I went hiking and cliff diving and did ALOT of swimming. I just wishi had jumped of that one cliff, but i thought about it once to many so i chickened out. Oh well. It was great so ill try again if i do go again. I wont say it agin ;-) so ill just sign out here.~

In All Things

At times the world seems to cave in and almost colapse on you. It is in times like these that we must deny the strong self-will inside of ourselfs to try and fix things on our terms, our way. We need to give up ourselfs and put our trust and hope in the Lord. If we would do that on his time instead of our own we migh tspare ourselfs some of the sorrow and agony. He dose not promise the load and the road to be easy, but he dose promise to always be there for us through it all. In all things he is there for us. Knowing that he is there helping us makes the going eaiser. It is better to carry the yoke of Christ than the yoke of our own sin and demise. In all things we must put our hope and trust in Christ.

A Verb

Love is a verb. Not just a emotion or a way of dicription but an act shown all the time.
Love in a relationship is more than sayin i love you every morning and evening. It is Helping with the dishes, picking up after yourself, opeaning the door for that person, picking a flower for them, squezing their hand in encouragement, helping them in the little things, and not just in the rought times, bringing them breakfast in bed in a spur of the moment idea, Being the first to apologise after an argument, keeping their favorite shirt or shoes clean, consoleing after a rough day, laughing them up when they are down, sacrafising your free time to spend it with them.

Love showed twards friends is walking with them to class instead of taking the shortcut, visiting them when they are alone or sick, calling them in the middle of a boring summer, letting them cry on your shoulder when then need a shoulder, cautioning them when you think they might hurt themselfs, giving them a ride even if it is a littel oout of the way of oyour destination.

Love in general, to all people is obvious but we often neglect it. Picking up the package of macaroni th elderly lady droped in the store, helping some one shorter than you reach something, helping someone pickup the contents of their shopping bag that had just broke, giving someone the right-of-way on the street, moving someone out of the way of falling boxes, helpign someone carry their many packages, showing common curtisy to everyone you meet.

Love is a verb.

Don't

*Dont be scared of what may come. Face life head on, and hey, you never know if something wonderful is waitin gfo ryou just around the corner.
*Dont wait for tomorow to wish you had done it yesterday.
*Dont sit there wishing you could just get up and say what you mean. The first step to anything is taking that first step.
*Dont get caught up in the flow of the every day norm. Break away from your security bubble and create something new and excitingly different.
*Dont sit trying to be avoided in a conversation that shows hypocricy and injustice to the truth. Sit up straight, look the spaker in the eye and make yourself heard loud and clear for what is right and true.

~*One good deed done on your way can, for the best, change everyones day*~

Worth the Hard Work

My chior is doign a fundraising program for the kids who want to go to New York City to sing in Carnegie Hall called Rent-a-Kid. People can rent a pair or more of us who are willing to work to do work such as mowing laws, yard work, sweeping, washing windows, washing cars, and such.

Today me and three other girls and one of the girls brothers went out to a house south of the Wynochie Dam to RAKE the couple s WHOLE front and side yard that totals about a little over 2 acres. We first raked away all of the rocks and sticks from the dirt (there was no grass. It still needs to be planted.) Then we took piles of fertilizer/top soil and raked piles of that flat over about half of the yard. We raked for seven hours and were still not done. Going back tomorow to finnish it all up. All the while it is 105 degrees outside.

That is what kids do when they are determined to get somewhere. I and 13 others are willing to work our way to New York while the other 15 are putting their hopes alone in sponsors and their parents to get the funds to be able to go. I know ill have the money by the time we begin to pack next spring. All the hard work will be worth it when I walk up those steps and open the doors of Carnigie Hall to experience what few have ever experienced.

And, hey, I actualy liek the work. It dont bother me on ebit. Im just glad God invented gloves! :-)

Dance!

I think it is so great to just be all alone in the house with no one around. That way you can put in your favorite CD and just dance! You don have to be the greatest dancer. Dance fo fun! Jump, twirl, spin, jig, or just bounce around the coutch! No ones there to tell you that you cant dance, your just having a blast and jammin to the music!
...Ofcourse you wanna check out the window every so often to make sure no one walks in on you while your attempting to moon walk on the piano bench! lol. Everybody loves ta dance!

Is Watermellon good for the skin?

Just had a watemellon fight with my best friend. It was relly fun but i got watermellon everywhere!...almost:-) It was fun. It started out as a eating contest to see who could eat their side of teh watermellon the fastest. I was ahead but she cheated(it was acceptible tho) and we fought over the husk the husk slit and it sloshed away from there. But i smell like mellons! ... is mellon good for your skin?:-P

A beautiful day

Is it cloudy? So what? Its georgious! You are lesslikely to get sunburned and its a pleasent temp! Is is sunny out? Yeah! Its dazling! You can get a great tan and go play outside with friends! Is is raining? Alright! Its good for the gouround(no brown grass) and you can dance in the rain! Dont complain. It migh tbe the best day of you life. You never know. Every day is a beautiful day. Dont complain about the weather. You cant change it. You might just want the clouds when you wanted rain but if it was rainy you might witsh it was just sunny! Go on with your day being thankful its not raining eggs, or be thankful the suns not any closer to earth, or thankful that the cluds arent just polution! And everyone says Amen! Have a great day!

First tase

I will be getting my first taste of being on my own for the next three weeks. Mom and brother will be gone, dad will be home but i am on my own in the mornings and evenings and have no transportation anywhere before 12 am and after 5 pm (unless of course I call a friend to pick me up...unlikely.) I am dreading the extended aloneness and not having my mom there to console, counsel and encourage me when I need it. I am getting my first real taste of fending for myself and really get to understand the dicipline it takes to get on alone. With most friends busy, I only have my ever faithful fish who never leaves me...lol. I will be drawing closer to the Lord in all things and I know he will not let me down. I am anticipating great things for this summer..thought i dont see anything but the droll of my normal old cage. I will be steping out on nothing and finding something there. Stepping out on faith. Im gonna be more than fine and OK. Im gonna do great.

"The way i see it" a cool quote i found

They told you that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What they failed to tell you is that it is best seen with teh eyes closed. What you look like isnt important. What is important is who you are inside and the choices you are making in your life. - Tiana Tozer 1992 Paralympic silver and 1996 broze medalist, womens wheelchair basketball.

Think about it. Its true. Its nice to look nice or even pretty, beautiful, but the real importance is who you are inside and the choices you make everyday

Who we are.

Its amazing, you know, how people think you are one way but your really another? You want them to see how you really are but they either wont or cant. Around most people in your life you can truly be who you really are and they acept that and life goes on! But for a few in your life they are tuned to how they think you act or should act. How you work, how you live, what your prioritys are, and even what makes you go on, get up and face the day with determination. Even what modivates you. All we need is patience, a kind or, even lenient heart to put up with these few, and trust that God will set things right in his own good time.